Monday, October 12, 2015

Dear Crotchety Woman

You walk on the path 'round the lake every day. Today you clapped and shouted at a flock of tired geese gently snoozing on the bank. I saw you. I talked to you and I can't believe you.

Clapping and shouting at sleeping birds is uncool. You had to go out of your way to approach them. You are a tool! You scared the whole flock and generally caused a ruckus on the end of the lake.

Smiling and saying, "They poop everywhere!" does not excuse you or your actions.
I wish I could burst into your bedroom or bathroom to clap and shout at you during your quiet time.

I hope something large poops on you.
In your hair.
And down your back.

Oh, your walking shoes look stupid and your windbreaker has a big stain on it, ya jackwagon.


I had this excellent idea to begin feeding a murder of crows. I had dreams of them bringing me gifts and maybe feeding them by hand. You can imagine how stoked I was.

The crows haven't been back since I posted my idea to the blog. Are they telepathic?

At least the fish are biting in the lake. Well, its a big pond really. Maybe I'll take the paddle boat into the middle and see if I can jig for crappie. The bass along the shore are a guaranteed catch with a white jig and curly tail soft body. Pull that same jig fast through the top ten inches of water and its pretty close to a strike each cast.

Lets see what the middle of the lake has to offer mid day.

Friday, October 9, 2015


I finally have something fun to write about!


A whole murder of them hang out in the tree at the edge of our patio. I know what some of you are thinking. No, I'm not going to capture one of them and no I'm not going to capture two of them. But, I am going to feed them. 

Crows have been known to bring gifts to people who feed or rescue them. There are a few stories on the internet of it happening to people in the past.

Can you imagine receiving treasures from a murder of crows? 
I'm so excited!